The Digit-al Dozen Does Neon--The rainbow of our lives

Hi Everyone today is bad day/sad day for me.  6 years ago today I said goodbye to my beautiful sister, Lisa.  I don't like to say she passed away because honestly if you've ever watched anyone battle and then die from cancer they don't "pass away".  They do not go gently into that goodnight. Their bodies fight like hell until the very last breath to stay alive--so no one who succumbs to cancer simply passes away.

Sometimes in the rainbows of our lives we get dealt a heavy blow.  We lose someone we love and even though you have to put on the big front and go to work and act okay or spend time with your friends and family and act okay inside you are dying a little bit each day.  While we love so much we also grieve.  Where there is great love and joy there is also sadness.

Today I am wearing the rainbow of my life.  My accent nail is the grief I carry everyday over the loss of my sister, my very beautiful sister Lisa, my best friend.  She can never be replaced.

I will think of her today with both sadness and joy.  I will remember how she was one of the very best things about my life for almost 45 years.  I will remember her smile, her laughter, and her gentle nature.  But I will also remember she could not spell for shizz and she had no clue where anything was in the world geography wise.  I will remember while she was an exceptionally snazzy dresser she once over cooked ring bologna until it split and under cooked the macaroni so it was crunchy.

I will remember she could keep a secret and took many of them-probably thousands of them with her.  I will remember she was the strongest fighter I have ever met but I will also remember she used to wear Candie's high heeled sandals with knit shorts.  I will remember she loved unconditionally but I will also remember she couldn't drive stick shift to save her life.

Everyday even though there is goodness and light--love and joy there is also a black pit of despair for what I can never have again in this life.  I may not always wear it on the outside but everyday I live this rainbow--the rainbow of my life

I used some of the China Glaze Electric Nights for my neon rainbow and topped it with China Glaze Fairy Dust because Fairy Dust makes everything better

My accent nail is done using the "bird's nest" technique which I first saw this technique that didn't have a name in a video posted on Minhas unhas Facebook page that you can check out HERE  She does some pretty cool things!  But basically you just drop 2 or three drops of polish onto parchment paper or silicone baking sheet and swirl and swirl and swirl until the polish starts to dry and you can draw patterns in it.  Let it dry and apply like a decal

I applied mine over a coat of white

Thankfully the sun was out for about 20 minutes today so i got some nice pictures of this.

To any of you who also live this rainbow daily my heart goes out to you.  Loving someone and losing them is never easy.  And no matter what anyone says time does not heal all wounds.  Some wounds never heal but I truly believe one day we will be together again and that's why I still have joy and hope in my life right alongside the grief and despair

An InLinkz Link-up